|
When it appears that you have killed a monster, NEVER check to see if it's dead.
Never read aloud from a book that summons demons.
Do not search the basement when the power is out.
If your children suddenly speak in Latin or in another persons voice, shoot them immediately. This will save you both a lot of grief in the long run. Use lots of bullets.
When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off or go it alone.
Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt.
If you searched for something that caused a loud noise and find out that it's just the cat, GET THE HELL OUT!
Do not check for short circuits in appliances that start operating by themselves, just get out!
Do not take anything from the dead.
If a town looks deserted, there is a good reason. Do NOT stop to look around.
Don't fool around with recombinant DNA unless you know what you are doing.
Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are, Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, The Bermuda Triangle and any small town in Maine.
If your house is built upon an old cemetery, move in with the in-laws immediately. This also applies if the previous inhabitants went mad, or died in some horrible fashion or have performed satanic practices.
If you run out of gas at night on a lone road, do not go to the nearby, deserted looking house to phone. If you suspect the tank is still half full, shoot yourself immediately. You are going to die anyway and will most likely be eaten.
Back to Lists Home
|
|
