The Law Enforcement
Translator
|
|
Back to Lists Home |
| What
is Said |
What
is Meant |
|
|
| While on routine patrol... |
I was in the car because the coffee shop was closed. |
|
|
| The motorist was operating his vehicle
in a reckless manner... |
He had a bumper sticker that said "SLOW DOWN--DON'T FEED THE PIGS" |
|
|
| The accident scene and the safety of the victims prevented this officer from
doing traffic control. |
It was raining. |
|
|
| This officer went out-of-service to
obtain intelligence information from a street informant. |
It was too hot to ride in the
car. |
|
|
| I observed the suspect acting in a
suspicious manner... |
The dirt-bag let go with an
'Oink' as I walked by. |
|
|
| Knowing the suspect had a criminal history... |
He puked on my uniform one
night... |
|
|
| The informant is of known credibility and has provided reliable information in the past... |
I've got two theft cases hanging over his head... |
|
|
| The motorist was cited for multiple traffic violations... |
I wrote him one citation for each swear-word he used... |
|
|
| Upon announcing my title and purpose I heard a voice from inside the house say 'Come in' so this writer entered the door. |
The rock music was so loud they wouldn't have heard Patton's army so I kicked in the door. |
|
|
| The members of the press at the scene were offered every courtesy within departmental policies... |
I sent them to a
non-existent address which I called the 'Command Post' |
|
|
| I gave the motorist a verbal warning for speeding... |
She was a good-looking blonde who owned a liquor store
and who was free after my shift was over. |
|
|
| The Chief appeared at the scene and took command. |
I sent him to the same address as
the reporters. |
|
|
| Further interview of the witnesses was impossible, due to conditions. |
Tonight is my bowling night... |
|
|
| The motorist's eyes were glassy, he had
slurred speech, was unsteady on his feet, and smelled strongly of alcohol. |
He was howling at the moon and trying to drive the car from the back seat. |
|
|
| Using only enough force to restrain the subject... |
My favorite song is 'Drop kick me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life'. |
|
|
| The defendant asked this officer's
advice on how to act before the judge at his arraignment... |
I told him he didn't have the balls to call the judge the same name he called me. |
| Back to Lists Home |
