|
One day in the city of Juarez, a group of people who happened to be outside on a warm summer day, (taking
their afternoon siesta one would suppose), witnessed an event that would spur talk of a local hero for many days.
Off in the distance was seen a man in a big white hat, riding a big white horse. As he approached a crowd gathered, for one legendary man stood clear in
their minds. My friends, I believe it is Poncho Villa
that approaches.
As this stranger got closer so that his face could be seen, a gasp went through the crowd, for this was not Poncho Villa. Hell, his posters were up all over town. The crowd,
amazed that someone would try to impersonate such a great local hero, gathered close and pelted the stranger with questions.
"Who are you?" "where do you come from?" "Why are you dressed like Poncho Villa?" "Are you his friend?"
At the last question the stranger, riding the big white horse, tilted back his big white hat, and spoke these words.
"You ask me who I am, you ask me eef I know Poncho Villa, you ask eef I am hees friend, let me tell you a story."
So the stranger climbed off his horse and stood leaning with his poncho pulled back so that all could see the big, shiny gun that he carried low on his hip. He then began to speak and the crowd grew quiet.
"You see, I was walking down de road on de way to Juarez today, when from behind me I hear de sound of a horse come. I look down de road to see who is coming, and far away I see a man on a big, white horse, wearing a big white hat, riding to me. And I says to myself, 'Jose, I tink that that is Poncho Villa riding his big, white horse.' and as de hombre on the horse come closer, I saw that eet was indeed the Poncho Villa who face was posted on walls throughout all Mexico."
"And as Poncho Villa approached, he slowed his big, white horse, and he looked at me, and he smiled, and all de gold in his teeth did sparkle like de sunlight. Then he pulled his big, heavy gun, and he pointed eet at me, and he said 'you... pull down you pants!' What could I do, he had a gun. So I pulled down my pants. Then he looked at me and smiled, 'now, take a sheet'.. ayeee, I had no choice, he had a gun. Then he wave that pistol at me and he say, 'Now eat et!' but for that gun, cavrone!, so I ate eet."
"And Poncho Villa, he laugh so hard, he fall off that big, white horse, and he drop that big gun, and I pick eet up, and I point eet at him. And he quits laughing. Den I say to Poncho Villa, drop you pants! what could he do, I had de gun. Now I says to him, take a sheet, he no smile now. and I wave that big gun at heem and I says, now eat et!" "And you ask me if I know Poncho Villa! Hell, yes I know Poncho Villa! I had lunch with heem today!"
Back to Miscellaneous Jokes Home
|
|
