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Father O Shea is an old, old
priest in a tiny parish in a remote part of Ireland
In fact, he's so old some of the other priests in neighboring parishes are
concerned that he is senile and no no longer competent to celebrate Mass.
Because of this, two priests, Father Ryan and Father O Toole decide to sit
in on one of his masses.
The next Sunday, they sit in the front pew, as Father O Shea begins his
sermon.
"Today" Father O Shea begins," Today, we're going to talk about sin!"
The two other priests nod to each other ," Well, that is a general enough
topic, it's alright"
O Shea continues," And the first sin we're going to talk about is stealing!
If ye steal while yer alive, yer hand will rise up from the grave. Yer hand
will wave this way. And yer hand will wave that way. And this way. And that
way. And this way and that way and this way and that way and this way and
that way so that every one will know that a thief was buried here!"
The two priests are quite rattled. Father Ryan says," This is rather odd"
"Yes very odd!" Father O Toole says, " But alright"
By this time, old Father O Shea is really excited "The next sin we're going
to talk about is the sin of lying! If ye lie while yer alive, after ye die
yer tongue will rise up from the grave. And yer tongue will wave this way.
And yer tongue will wave that way. And this way. And that way. And this way
and that way and this way and that way and this way and that way so that
every one will know that a liar was buried here"
The two other priests are very, very rattled, but they let the Mass
continue.
By this time Father O Shea is on a roll
"The next sin we're going to talk about is adultery-"
At this point Father O Toole jumps up "Ye stop right there Father. Ye keep
talking like this and yer cemetery will look like an asparagus field!"
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