Paddy and Seamus are on a walking holiday in Wales, when they see Taffy and his mate coming towards them carrying a big sack of plump poached salmon.

"How did you get those?", asks Seamus.

"No problem", says Taffy "if you get low enough, you can easily see the salmon swimming towards you. So my mate hangs me over the bridge by my ankles till I see the fish, then up quick with net and it's in the bag for supper - easy man".

Right, thinks Seamus, we'll have a bit of that, so within minutes, he's hanging Paddy over the bridge by the ankles.

Suddenly Paddy starts screaming - "Pull me up ! Pull me up quick!! THERE'S A BLOODY TRAIN COMING!!