Oregon Jokes
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| While rummaging through a small bookstore in Astoria, Oregon, last weekend I found a fun little book called _Oregon's Best Jokes_. Here are just a few of my favorites from the book: |
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What do you call two days of rain in Portland? A weekend. |
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What did the Oregonian say to the Pillsbury Doughboy? "Nice Tan." |
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What's the most popular sight to see in downtown Portland? An empty parking space. |
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What do you get after four years of dope smoking? A degree from Reed College. |
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What's the difference between Beaverton and Hillsdale? In Beaverton, they're worried about having a BMW. In Hillsdale, they're just worried about having a BM. |
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In Beaverton, they say: It's 10 o'clock -- do you know where your children
are?
In Gresham, they say: It's 10 o'clock -- do you know _who_ your children are?
In Troutdale, they say: It's 10 o'clock -- do you know what time it is? |
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What's the Lake Oswego version of a Pit Bull fight? Two poodles yapping at each other until one of them wets the carpet. |
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What's a Lake Oswego housewife's favorite thing to make for dinner? Reservations. |
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What was the first indication that Senator Packwood might be guilty of sexual misconduct? He didn't know "harass" was one word. |
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Why does Albany smell? So that blind people can hate living there too. |
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The smell from Albany's so rude
It made one young tourist conclude
The cause of the scent
Came from each resident Eating too darn much Mexican food.
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What do you call a Eugene "Renaissance Man?" A guy who can smoke pot, read your aura, and play air guitar at the same time. |
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What's Scandinavian and has an I.Q. of 140? Astoria. |
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From: Oregon's Best Jokes, Copyright 1995, by Elliot Maxx & Friends. |
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